Why Managing your Anger with a Dash of Compassion is the Need of the Hour

Mental health is of grave concern in these turbid times


She swayed gently down the street, a soft demeanour in her walk. She couldn't wait to munch on some fresh greens as she had been hungry for hours. This large elephant was known as a gentle giant, and she moved towards her human friends with glee when she sighted food after what felt like ages. She consumed her first morsel with great relief. Only to find herself burning. “What was happening?” She felt pain shooting through her body and she rushed down the street towards the river, while being careful enough not to trample her human friends or destroy their homes. Gently, she entered into the water, tears streaming down her face. “Stop, please stop the pain. Someone help me,” she cried internally as she started feeling her yet-to-be-born baby writhing in pain within and asking her with anguish - “Save me”. She looked with loving eyes towards the crowd gathered around. No one could help her. She lost consciousness slowly, bleeding to death - in her mind, body, and soul, falling as gently as her gentle sway had been. She only remembered the love her humans had given her, not knowing they had brought the mighty elephant’s downfall, as they watched her crumble in pain without a flicker of emotion.


Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned. - Buddha

The recent incident that occurred in Kerala, India has thrown up debates all around with anger and hate being spewed online among people who have conflicting views about the incident. The practice of using explosive devices to scare animals is not new. (That we need to find an alternative is a different area of concern.) The incident has created a spark of arguments with hatred building up within communities and the war of words continuing online.


Animal welfare groups have been quick to highlight a child’s psychology which attributes killing or hurting animals as a fun factor - something that already exists. This begins with the pulling of a tail, tying a dog to a vehicle, throwing stones, kicking animals, and more. Children in particular, who abuse animals may be emulating violent methods learned at home. This is a matter of grave concern in the area of mental health for all.

In the times of coronavirus stress, there has been greater unrest over many issues plaguing the world today. The recent killing of George Flyod in the USA has highlighted the growing need for compassion in a world filled with hatred, anger, stress, and violence. Racism continues and the support that turned up for George Flyod was indeed commendable with #BlackLivesMatter trending our timelines.

But, the turn of events in the form of mass destruction, setting properties ablaze, and violent reactions of anger resulted in even more losses for humankind.


The biggest loss? It has been one of humanity.


If we observe the turn of events, there is one common thread in all.

The rising levels of internal anger and disturbed mental imbalance. Internal disturbances are then expressed onto others in ways that are hurtful, destructing, and harmful for self and others.

Curbing anger is more than learning to be calm and feeling zen in life. Curbing anger takes practice to be able to manage emotions with greater ease.


Why are we living in an age of anger?


The spurts of emotions are visible in the online world where connecting, commenting, and reacting are available at the click of a button. Sometimes, the event may even be trivial. However, a strong emotional response often indicates that one may not be in touch with the fundamental feeling within. Social media in particular, allows one to trample into someone’s space, and bring the person down. In the real world, a simple incident such as being cut off while driving can result in a road rage.

When anger becomes an addiction in itself, a person may tend to look for situations to be angry. This type of unprocessed anger only results in harm to self and environment. The issue stems from unresolved anxiety with anger rising due to frustration levels causing physical problems in the body.

What is the need of the hour?
People need to equip themselves with the right skills on an emotional level. This in turn impacts their behavior to break the repeated habit of intense anger, and violent reactions. People who master these techniques can retain their calm and focus on alternative solutions without sinking into a quicksand of anger.


How to Manage Anger to Create Better Energy Levels


1. Maintain distance


The recent killing of George Flyod in the USA has highlighted the growing need for compassion in a world filled with hatred, anger, stress, and violence.

By this we mean, maintain distance from your thoughts which are highly ignited in the moment. Anger about the current situation may cloud your thinking into performing acts that are unsuitable for self and others. Distance does not mean suppressing anger. Building meditation practice works towards raising awareness towards one’s thoughts with complete presence of the situation.


2. Take a quick break

Everytime you feel rising levels of anger mounting up, take a break and move away from the situation. On a physical level, you can go for a walk, call a friend, hit a pillow, or even count up to 10. It permits you to calm your thoughts to begin thinking with a fresh approach while being aware of any mistakes you may make in a bout of violent anger.

3. Acknowledge your feelings

It’s important to deal with anger by accepting the emotion and being true to yourself that you feel it intensely. Your next step should be to calm your senses down while trying to figure the triggers in the situation. Is the situation connected to some part of your past? Have you been facing lack of sleep? A constant feeling of tiredness, anger, anxiety, and hate bottled up only leads to physical and mental ailments. Acknowledging what you feel and then releasing it is one of the best ways to learn to let go.

Anger stored within is harmful for your physical and emotional state of mind. Writing down your feelings or saying a prayer helps to channelize these emotions to raise optimistic levels in your body. Developing compassion and gratitude helps you understand different perspectives while learning to disassociate the opinions of people with your own.

Although anger, anxiety, and fear are on the rise due to uncertainty, building resilience is one step away.


Join Us


Have you been feeling intense anger? Do you think you need to manage your emotions? Do you feel you have no one to talk to?

We feel you.

Join us as a Participant at Tava-Mitram. We offer free Group Coaching sessions for those who seek to build emotional strength. We are a not-for-profit offering our services through highly trained professionals (coaches) who volunteer for a cause. Our sessions are available online as well as offline.

Need to know more? Watch our videos on Facebook. You can also share your feelings in our Confession Box. It’s anonymous.

Questions? Write to [email protected].

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